Xanth 24 - The Dastard by Piers Anthony

Author:Piers Anthony [Anthony, Piers]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Tags: Fiction, General, Fantasy Fiction, Fantasy, Humorous, Humorous Stories, Epic, Xanth (Imaginary Place)
ISBN: 9780812574739
Publisher: Macmillan
Published: 2000-01-01T08:00:00+00:00

10

DASTARDLY DEAL

The Dastard was pleased, which was an unusual state for him. Not only had he gotten into some panties, they had turned out to be fairly decent ones, all things considered. Now Xena was on her way elsewhere, and he and Becka were on their way to the next nexus.

This turned out to be a group of vaguely demon-like creatures. They were busily excavating a hole in the ground.

"Who are you?" the Dastard inquired. "In fact, what are you?"

One of them glanced up. "Hello, mortal man. I'm Jeorge, and this is my sister Jeorgia and my junior, Jerry. We're jinns."

"They all begin with J," Becka murmured, impressed.

"That's interesting," the Dastard said, bored. "What are you doing?"

"We're digging out a precious Jeode we located by sheer chance," Jeorge said proudly. As he spoke, it came free.

"It looks like a dull rock," the Dastard said disparagingly.

"Oh, but it isn't," the jinn said. He tapped it, and it fell into two halves. In each half was a lovely three-dimensional picture of a beautiful scene.

"This is a representation of our long-lost home," Jeorgia said raptly. "It exists only within special stones: Jeodes. We have searched for a century to find one, and now by incredible luck we have found it."

"We could search for another century," Jerry said, "and never find another. They're very rare."

"How did you come across it?" Becka asked, obviously intrigued.

"I happened to see the faintest glint from a speck on its surface in a momentary beam of sunlight," Jeorge said. "Had I not by amazing fortune been looking in that direction at that instant, I would have missed it."

"This is the culmination of our eternal ambition," Jeorgia said. "Now we can at last relax and bask in its special beauty and relevance to our lost land."

"But why don't you just go home, if you like it so much?" Becka asked.

A tear welled in Jerry's eye. "We can't," he said. "It was destroyed by a terrible storm."

"That sounds like Fracto," Becka said. "The worst of clouds."

"Yes, it was Cumulo Fracto Nimbus," Jeorgia agreed. "He's really a type of demon. The Demon Queen was so angry at this breach of interdisciplinary etiquette that she enchanted him to take solid form for the next three-point-nine years. But the damage was done, and Fracto has long since finished his sentence and returned to his mean-spirited ways, while we searched endlessly for what little we could salvage of our home." She gazed at the scenes in the half stones. "Now at last we have our desire."

"The Demon Queen can do that?" Becka asked, amazed.

"Oh, yes," Jerry answered. "She could transform King Dor into a dor-mouse if she wanted to."

The Dastard had heard enough. He grabbed Becka's hand and slid into limbo. He went back an hour, to before the jinns spied the stone, and emerged in Xanth.

"As if I need to ask what you are going to do," Becka said sourly.

"You agreed not to interfere," he reminded her.

"I wish I hadn't."

The Dastard used a stick

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